Dan and Shay’s tragedy: Why the country-pop duo almost split

Country music duo Dan + Shay have achieved immense success in recent years, including three Grammy Awards and a hit song with Justin Bieber. However, behind the scenes, the duo was on the verge of disbanding due to personal and professional challenges.

As Shay Mooney revealed in an interview with All Things Considered host Juana Summers, the duo’s differing personal and professional paths threatened to end their decade-long partnership. “As we progressed in our career and things started to happen … we both got married and kind of started our own lives,” Mooney said.

Their story serves as a testament to the unique pressures faced by musical duos, and their journey from estrangement to reconciliation offers valuable insights into the challenges of maintaining a successful partnership in the music industry.

Key Takeaways

• Dan + Shay’s success was threatened by personal and professional differences.
• The duo’s fifth album, “Bigger Houses,” almost didn’t materialize due to their challenges.
• Their story highlights the unique pressures faced by musical duos.
• Their journey from estrangement to reconciliation is a valuable lesson.
• The duo’s experience resonates with fans who have faced similar challenges.

The Breaking Point Behind the Success

The duo’s success story took a dramatic turn when they found themselves at a breaking point, questioning their passion for music and their partnership. In 2021, Dan Smyers and Shay Mooney were at the height of their career, having won a Grammy Award and completed their headlining The (Arena) Tour.

A Career at Its Peak

On the surface, it seemed like Dan and Shay were living their dream. They had achieved immense success, with their songs topping the charts and their tour selling out. As I was in the lowest low of my entire life, Smyers recalled, highlighting the contrast between their public image and private struggles. Their career was on an upward trajectory, but beneath the surface, they were struggling to cope with the pressures of their rapid ascent.

The Hidden Struggles

Despite their outward success, both Smyers and Mooney were experiencing profound personal dissatisfaction and burnout. Mooney reflected on the strain their busy schedule had put on their friendship, stating, I could feel the separation and I think there was little things between you and I that we never talked about and it was affecting everything, including their marriages and overall well-being. The pressure to constantly produce new music and perform had taken a toll on their mental health, making them feel like they were losing themselves in the process.

As they navigated this challenging time, they began to realize that their struggles were not just about their career, but also about their personal lives and relationships. It was a difficult period, but one that ultimately led them to re-evaluate their priorities and find a way to move forward together.

Dan and Shay’s tragedy: Why the country-pop duo almost split

Behind the success of Dan and Shay lies a story of struggle, including a critical period where the duo’s relationship was on the verge of collapse. Dan Smyers and Shay Mooney, known for their harmonious vocals and hit songs, faced a significant challenge that threatened to end their musical partnership. Their journey to the top was not without its obstacles, and understanding these challenges provides insight into the duo’s resilience and dedication to their craft.

Communication Breakdown

A critical factor in the duo’s near-split was a breakdown in communication. The pressure of their rising fame, coupled with their different personalities, created tension that eventually led to a significant rift. Mooney describes himself as “a crazy optimist,” while Smyers identifies as “a crazy pessimist,” highlighting fundamental differences in how they approached challenges and interacted with each other.

The lack of effective communication exacerbated their growing estrangement, making it difficult for them to address issues promptly. As their careers advanced, the duo found themselves increasingly consumed by their professional obligations, leaving little time for personal connections. This neglect of their personal relationship ultimately affected their ability to work together seamlessly.

Growing Apart Despite Success

Despite their professional success, Dan and Shay found themselves growing apart. The duo’s inability to celebrate their achievements together reflected a deeper disconnect, as they were no longer sharing the emotional experience of their career milestones. Personal life changes, including marriages and Mooney’s growing family, created natural divergence in their priorities and daily routines.

Their different approaches to life and the pressures of fame further contributed to their growing apart. Mooney’s optimism sometimes clashed with Smyers’ pessimism, creating friction that was not adequately addressed. This friction, combined with the demands of their career, strained their relationship and impacted their music.

The Four-Month Silence

The culmination of their communication breakdown and growing estrangement was a four-month period of silence between Dan Smyers and Shay Mooney. During this time, the future of their musical partnership remained uncertain as they took time to “step back and just assess” where things stood. This period of reflection was crucial for both artists, allowing them to evaluate their priorities and the state of their relationship.

The silence was a turning point, prompting both members to reflect on their actions and the direction of their partnership. It was a challenging period, but it ultimately provided an opportunity for growth and renewal, enabling them to re-evaluate their priorities and strengthen their bond.

The Burnout That Nearly Ended It All

With their career at its peak, Dan and Shay faced an unexpected challenge: the strain of constant touring and social media pressure. The duo’s relentless schedule had taken a toll on their mental and physical health, causing burnout that threatened to derail their success.

The Toll of Touring

The grueling touring schedule was a significant contributor to their burnout. “We finished that tour in Boston at TD Garden — sold out show. You know, we should have been riding the highest high of our entire lives,” Smyers said. The show felt great, and they appreciated the connection with their fans, but it was a major symptom of their exhaustion. The constant travel and performance schedule left them little time to rest or recharge.

• The relentless touring schedule culminated in a sold-out show at Boston’s TD Garden, highlighting the extent of their burnout.
• The modern music industry’s demands extend beyond creating and performing music, with social media obligations creating 24/7 pressure.

Social Media Pressure

Part of their exhaustion was caused by the need to be on social media constantly. “It’s not just enough to make great music and be done with it. It’s like, you got to really be on 24/7 delivering content, creating content, and I feel like I was spending way more time doing the social media thing, trying to come up with ideas to go viral or, you know, to get good engagement on social media,” Smyers said. This constant pressure to produce content took a toll on their mental health and diverted their focus from their musical craft.

Personal Lives vs. Professional Demands

The balance between their personal lives and professional demands became increasingly unsustainable. Both artists felt they were sacrificing their home lives and mental health to maintain their career trajectory. The pandemic’s disruption of their first arena tour in 2020 added additional stress when they finally returned to the road in 2021, as expectations were heightened after the long delay.

As the duo navigated these challenges, they began to realize that their success came at a cost. They had to re-evaluate their priorities and find a way to maintain their career while preserving their well-being.

The Conversation That Changed Everything

Dan and Shay’s trajectory changed forever with a conversation in March 2022 that addressed their underlying issues. This pivotal moment marked a turning point for the duo, allowing them to re-evaluate their partnership and make necessary changes.

Facing the Truth

The conversation revealed that both Smyers and Mooney had stopped actively nurturing their relationship, allowing external pressures and unaddressed grievances to create distance. As Smyers said, “We just weren’t working on it. We let things get in the way. We let things fly out the window.” This acknowledgment was crucial in understanding the root cause of their problems.

Mooney agreed, stating that the conversation “changed everything.” It was a moment of truth where both artists acknowledged their commitment to the duo and their music. The conversation highlighted how lack of communication had exacerbated their problems, but also showed that both Smyers and Mooney still deeply valued their partnership.

Rebuilding Their Friendship First

Through their conversation, Smyers and Mooney recognized that rebuilding their friendship needed to be prioritized before attempting to revive their professional collaboration. Smyers expressed that being in a room making music with Mooney was what “filled his cup the most.” This realization was key to re-establishing a foundation of trust and enjoyment in their partnership.

Finding Joy in Music Again

By reconnecting with their creative partnership, Dan and Shay aimed to address the burnout they had been experiencing. Mooney noted, “We love this band. This has been our life. It matters, and it matters to people. We had a responsibility.” Smyers added, “We owed it to them. If we’re going to keep going forever, let’s get ourselves right, man. Let’s have a gut check.” This renewed commitment to their music and to each other marked a new chapter in their career.

The conversation in March 2022 was a significant step towards healing and growth for Dan and Shay. By facing the truth, rebuilding their friendship, and finding joy in music again, the duo was able to move forward in a positive direction.

The Birth of “Bigger Houses”

With “Bigger Houses”, Dan and Shay have created an album that showcases their growth as artists. This new album represents a significant milestone in their career, marking a return to their organic, friendship-based approach to music.

A Return to Their Roots

The creation of “Bigger Houses” was a deliberate effort to revisit the duo’s early days. Dan Smyers noted that they started by sitting down with acoustic guitars, simply wanting to hang out and make music together. “It started at a very genuine place,” Smyers said. This approach allowed them to reconnect on a personal level, which in turn influenced their artistic output.

Creating Music Without Pressure

Without the pressure of deadlines or commercial expectations, Dan and Shay were able to create music that felt natural and authentic. “You and I sat down with acoustic guitars. We wanted to hang out. It was like writing a song was just our hanging out,” Smyers recalled. This relaxed approach to songwriting resulted in an album that truly reflects their friendship and musical chemistry.

The Album That Almost Didn’t Happen

The process of making “Bigger Houses” was transformative for Dan and Shay. Mooney said that the experience “completely changed our lives.” The album is not just a collection of songs but a testament to the duo’s journey through crisis to a more sustainable and fulfilling partnership. As Smyers noted, “I can feel the closeness of our relationship and our friendship when I listen back to the music.”

The album “Bigger Houses” is a reflection of Dan and Shay’s renewed joy in music and their strengthened friendship. It’s a testament to the power of taking a step back, re-evaluating priorities, and reconnecting with the core reasons they started making music together.

Moving Forward: A Sustainable Partnership

Dan and Shay’s experience has taught them valuable lessons about maintaining a healthy partnership. After a period of struggle, they redefined their measure of success, shifting from external metrics to finding fulfillment in the creative process itself. As Mooney said, “If you can find joy in the process of all these things, it just takes away all the pressures of the results.”

The duo’s newfound approach has allowed them to prioritize proactive communication about burnout and stress, addressing issues before they threaten their partnership. This change is crucial as they prepare for their 2024 “Heartbreak on the Map Tour” and their historic role as the first duo to co-judge on “The Voice.” By being proactive, they can maintain their healthier dynamic and continue to create music that resonates with their fans.

Their candid sharing of struggles through “The Drive” video has created a deeper connection with fans, who have responded with their own stories of relationship challenges and reconciliation. As Smyers noted, “Just putting our finger on what it was that really sent us down the wrong path, I feel like allows us to not go back down that path.” By learning from their experiences, Dan and Shay are poised to continue their successful career, with a renewed focus on the joy of making music.

vesna Novkovic